Harry Potter's Vegas Vacation
by Blood Brandy
Summary: It was supposed to be just a fun Vacation. But then he woke up with a horrible hangover. What happened? Where is he? Why does he remember seeing Elvis, and who is this girl saying she's his wife? Challenge fic from my own challenge.
1. The New Mrs Potter

**Chapter One- The New Mrs. Potter**

Pain…

Pain…

_PAIN…_

Harry Potter was in a lot of pain as the afternoon, desert sun shone through the window and onto his face, making his headache, which was already comparable to dwarves trying to mine out his head, even worse. He tried to remember what happened, even though it seemed like just thinking hurt his head.

_Christmas…Sirius…Moony…Plane trip…Vegas?_

Oh, yeah. As a Christmas present, Sirius had, somehow, decided to take a page from Wormtail's book and faked his own death (in public view in a way he refused to explain to Harry, "A marauder has his tricks") and, through Gringotts and despite his wanted criminal status, his will enacted as he had written it just after Harry had been born, which left James everything or, if he was dead, left it to Harry. At the time Sirius wrote it, it would have just included his flat, his savings and whatever he owned, but since he was never properly disowned before his parents bit the dust, and Harry had a Black as a grandmother that put him just ahead of Malfoy as an heir, Harry had been put in as a head of house for the Black family, and some further surprise legal juggling by Sirius through Gringotts got Harry emancipated, all for one reason.

So Sirius could send Harry to Las Vegas, Nevada.

Actually, Sirius was planning on Amsterdam, but Remus had talked him down, but Padfoot wouldn't budge lower than Vegas, with Moony as a chaperone, but only because Sirius himself couldn't go, because of his less than living legal status. And so, with a well made fake muggle I.D. and passport and as much money as he could need to gamble, and before anyone like Mrs. Weasley, Dumbledore or anybody could object, or even find out, Harry was on a plane for the states with Remus for the better part of the holidays.

And then, the last thing her could remember…Moony? Yeah, Moony was trying to convince him to have a drink. Harry gave in after a while and had a drink, then another…and another. Soon after, Harry's memory was blurry at best, and he could only remember flashes.

_Flashing lights…Booze…Cards…More Booze…Purple hair…an older girl…Elvis?_

For some reason, the girl and Elvis stuck in his head, like there was something important about them he should know, and would probably remember if his head could stop pounding.

Any other thought was cut off when another warm body cozied up to him and put their head on his chest.

"Morning, honey," said a young woman's somewhat monotone and sleepy voice, before waiting a second, "Or, afternoon, I guess."

Panicking, Harry near jumped out of the bed, but his feet were tangled in the sheets, causing him to fall out of the bed and pull the sheets with him as he learned four things.

1. Both Harry and the young woman were nude under the sheets

2. Despite the pounding pain in his skull, his waking body had gone about its normal morning routine

3. Screaming with what can only be a hangover, can make your head hurt even worse

4. When a hungover guy falls right on his 'morning condition', the pain seems comparable to the Cruciatus curse.

"Are you okay?"

All Harry could do is groan in pain as he lay in the fetal position. After a few moments, he managed to stagger to his feet and sit on the bed, making sure to keep covered and trying not to stare at the nude girl next to him.

"What time is it?" Was, oddly, the first thing he asked as he looked around the hotel room, which he recognized as _not_ being the one he had originally been checked in to. Hell, this room, despite an amazing amount of damaged furniture, busted lights and cracked walls, looked like it was originally at least five times as much as his room had been.

The unknown girl smirked, not seeming to care she was naked as she crawled to the foot of the bed, giving Harry a bit of a show before she fiddled with an odd circular device she picked up. As she did, Harry got a better look at her without the painful glare of the sunlight. She was pale, to the point that her skin seemed to be grey, but her body was rather fit, not like an athlete, but still fit, with a jewel on her forehead and from the looks of her little show, he had to guess her hair _was_ naturally purple. His…study, of her body was cut off when she finally answered his question.

"It's about…Four p.m. Wednesday afternoon."

"W-Wednesday?" Harry croaked, last he remembered, it had been…Sunday? Monday? It was fuzzy, but that seemed about the time Moony got him to drink. How in the world could he have blacked out almost three days?

She just nodded, "Sometimes, you seemed determined to try and get your liver to beg for mercy." She said dryly with a smirk. "I'll get you something for your head." She stood and started out of the room.

"Wait!" Harry yelled, instantly regretting it as he gripped his head. He took a couple calming breaths before quietly continuing, "Who are you? And where am I?" He took a quick second look around before adding, "And what the bloody hell happened here?"

The young woman stood in the doorway and turned to face him, showing him everything again before she smiled, oddly mischievously, and answered, "It's your complementary hotel suite. Apparently, after you cleaned up at the craps tables, blackjack and roulette, the casino set you up for free so they can try and win some back." She looked around a little before adding, "It was a lot better looking before we happened to it," she sighed, "But what a night…"

She saw Harry blush as he still held his head. She reached onto a nearby dresser and grabbed something as she prepared to drop a bomb, "As for who I am, I have to say I'm hurt, Harry, because, as of about 1:30 yesterday afternoon," she held up her left hand, which now had a ring on her finger, "I am Mrs. Rachel Raven Potter."

She watched as her new husband's eyes widened in comprehension, before they rolled back as he fell into a dead faint. She walked up and gave him a light kiss before leaving the room, smiling.

"He took that better than I thought."

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"…And you were supposed to be back almost two days ago."

Harry heard the new voice as he woke, his head still pounding.

"Look, I'll be back soon, tomorrow, Friday at the latest. I have something important happening here, important and _private._"

_That_ voice, Harry recognized, the girl who called herself Rachel Raven Potter.

Rachel Raven _Potter…_

Now, Harry didn't have much interaction with the world when he was young, at least not the world outside of Privet Drive, but even he had heard the stereotypical Vegas marriage stories and jokes. _That_ might explain why he remembered Elvis. Harry groaned a little as he cracked an eye, seeing Rachel in a white hotel bathrobe.

"Who was that Raven…Raven?" The voice asked.

"Look, I'll explain everything when I get back, okay?" 'Raven' answered, not giving time for the voice to answer, "Remember, _we'll_ be there in a day or two and tell you guys everything."

"What? What we-"

"Bye, Robin," Harry heard a beep and a click before a small crystal bottle swam into his vision, "Here, Harry, this will help you with the hangover."

With no hesitation, Harry grabbed the bottle, popped the cork and downed the contents, his face scrunching at the taste as his headache quickly faded to a dull throb.

"Yeah," Raven said, seeing his reaction, "Even magic can't change some things, if a potion is good for you, it is guaranteed to taste awful."

With his mind somewhat clearer, the words _magic_ and _potion_ registered quite clearly.

"Y-you're a witch?" Harry asked. Honestly, what are the chances of running into a witch like this?

"Well, not exactly, hang on," Raven sat on the bed next to Harry before grabbing the phone, "Do you want breakfast or dinner? This will take some time."

"Uh, dinner, I guess." Harry answered, still a little out of it.

"Right," Raven called room service, ordering a good amount of food before hanging up, "The food should be here in about half an hour."

"So, what did you mean 'not exactly' a witch?"

"Well, I'm not a witch as you know it," Raven said, leaning back against the headboard, "You see, there are a lot more magical people in the world than your…'civilization' acknowledges. You know that Statute of Secrecy your people have?" Harry nodded before Raven continued, "Well, that was put forth around the mid seventeenth century, supposedly because of a combination of the rise of witch burnings, the persecution of magical people and pressure for magical to use their powers solely for the gain of non-magicals. They put in place that statute and secluded themselves from the rest of the world, but not all magicals did so. There are a large number of different kinds of magical humans on earth, Harry, and by those of us outside your government's reach, people like you are referred to as warlocks, a type of person born with a natural affinity towards magic, it's part of you, body and soul."

"There are a lot of different types of magic, Harry, and warlocks like you are born suited to learn most of them, but for the most part you stick with a certain type of magic relying on wands, or sometimes staves, mostly for two reasons, first is that it's easier for you people to deal with. It's a power your people are familiar with, and they can watch it and monitor it to keep your secrecy. Second is that your societies isolation has made them somewhat…xenophobic."

Raven looked into Harry's eyes, "There are at least a good number of different types of mages and magics that aren't under their control and things that are unknown. As much as they might deny it, they are just like any other human, magic or not, if they find something new they don't understand, some may be curious, but most fear what they don't understand, and in many cases, fear can turn to hate. So they keep themselves almost completely closed off from everything else."

Harry took a few minutes to process what he had just been told. "I suppose I can believe that, so you use a different kind of magic than I do, right?"

"Well," Raven thought, "You can think of it like that. There are a lot of different ways of using magic, I can do many of the same things you can, I just do them differently," To demonstrate, she raised a hand which became enveloped in a black aura, as she did a chair in the corner of the room gained the same aura and lifted into the air for a few moments before setting back down.

"Wandless magic?" Harry muttered under his breath at the exhibition.

"Yes, wandless," Harry's eyes may have been momentarily stuck on the chair, but somehow he could just feel her rolling her eyes, "That's the thing about your style of magic, it's versatile and it's relatively easy to learn, you can learn it a few years where other styles can take decades. Personally, I've been learning almost since I could understand what magic was and, while I am skilled, I still have a lot to learn before I could be considered a master. But, while your style has advantages, all styles have at least one problem, and yours has one glaring weakness," she raised her hand and cast again, this time a familiar stick of wood gained the black aura and flew into her hand, "Without one of these, you can't do very much."

"So, other kinds of magic take longer to learn, but I wouldn't need a wand?" Harry asked as his mind kept processing.

"Mostly," Raven nodded, "there are those who could be considered prodigies that learn quicker, and there are some items that work a little like your wand and allow even those with no magical training, or even ability, to use some powerful magic and they can't do so without said item."

"Wait," Harry stopped her, more than a little surprised, "There are things that let muggles use magic?"

Raven raised an eyebrow, "I'm going to assume you mean people with no magic ability or training?" Harry nodded, "Yes, there are items that let them use magic with no training at all, but it can be very dangerous for them and others and most items like that either have a negative effect on the user, have restrictions on the powers or can only do certain types of magic. There's this one thief I know of who uses a special wand that lets him use magic, but it only lets him do things like a stage magician, making things appear and disappear with a top hat, changing people into animals and making cards and things appear from his sleeves, but its power drove him crazy and he just uses it to steal, and all his spells are undone when his wand is broken."

Harry sat for a moment, taking in what he'd been told, he may have just learned more than any History of Magic class he'd been able to stay awake for. Then, an idea struck him, "Could you teach me some of your style?" With Voldemort out and about, even if he was staying under the radar, anything new could give Harry an edge.

Raven's eyes seemed to get an odd light in the as she smirked, "Maybe," she said, "It would probably be difficult, but I could. But," she suddenly flipped herself over Harry, straddling the wizard as her robe loosened a little before pressing her lips to his for a moment, "I wonder what my husband would be willing to do in exchange for such lessons?"

Harry's mind began to race, with all he was being told from finding she was magic, the fact that this young woman on top of him was now his wife had been pushed to the back of his mind. He wasn't sure exactly what had happened while he was drinking, but Raven seemed ready for an encore or something, and Harry wasn't sure if-

*KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK* "Room service!"

Raven's expression turned to annoyed very quickly, "Just perfect timing," She climbed off of both Harry and the bed, tightening her robe, "I'll get the food, there's another robe in the bathroom and your underwear is…somewhere in here, I think. We can continue our talk in the living room over dinner," before Harry could react, she leaned in and kissed him again, this time her tongue pried its way into his mouth and played with his own for a moment before she broke away, walking to the door, she turned back, "And we continue everything else after that." She added with a wink.

Harry turned red as she left the room before setting to work looking for his clothes, his mind constantly wrestling with the new information, but one new fact overall.

_I'm bloody MARRIED!_

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Raven hummed a little tune, yes, actually hummed, as she set out dinner on the coffee table and set up a couple of chairs that weren't too badly damaged. She had to admit, the room was trashed, she was sweet talked into marrying a guy she'd know for three days tops and who was so drunk at the time he seemed to have trouble stringing more than four words together without slurring, and not only was she flirting with him, hell, openly teasing him, but she was initiating romantic contact, and if it weren't for the damn room service, she knew right now they'd be reenacting the previous night. She knew something was different, _she_ was different, but she couldn't completely bring herself to care. This wasn't her, but at the same time it was, she wasn't repressing her emotions or her powers, her emotions, no matter what she tried, were all free for her to feel and, somehow, her powers weren't running wild along with them. She was different than normal, but only because something about the past few days, something about her new husband, had set her free.

When she and her friends had defeated Trigon, her father, she'd felt what seemed like a great weight lift from her shoulders, the prophecy had passed but her father was defeated, this feeling was like that, but a hundred times greater. She didn't seem to need to be in constant control of herself anymore.

_Well,_ she thought to herself, looking around the room, _not usually anyway._

Yes, looking at the room, it seemed that extreme emotion, like the, she pleasurably shivered a bit at the word, _passion_ of her wedding night that had caused her powers to do considerable damage to their room. Although, it also seemed her powers weren't the only ones to do so, since, having surveyed the room, she could say her powers never caused a wall to go from beige white to red with gold polka-dots, or the curtains to start continuously purring. Thankfully, as they stumbled into the room, she'd had the presence of mind to through up some rudimentary barriers and, given they hadn't received any complaints, the barrier probably kept their powers contained, along with their cries.

She shook her blush from her face as she finished setting out the food, then she just sat back and waited for Harry as she listened to the soft purr of the curtains.

88888888

Meanwhile, at the Legion of Do-er…

Actually, at the Death Eater headquarters, things were a bit hectic. Just hours earlier during a meeting of his inner circle, Voldemort collapsed, writhing in pain and gripping his head. He had passed out and now many of his more intelligent followers were checking over everything they could, trying to find what had happened to their lord and master.

Said Dark Lord was just starting to come around, and didn't rightly know what had happened himself. One moment he had been plotting his next subversive moves before he would reveal himself to the world when he felt an odd sensation from his connection to the Potter brat, the same connection he had been trying to use to trick the brat into getting the prophecy, and next thing he knew he was no longer in the room with his followers, but standing on a rock that seemed to be floating in space, but surrounded by a number of figures whose bodies and faces were covered by cloaks and hoods of different colors, green, grey, pink, orange, yellow, purple, brown and red, all leaving only their lower faces shown, save for the last. The red cloaked person, whose aura screamed malice, had eyes glowing blood red glaring towards him.

_"He is ours,"_ Red said in a wrathful, smoky voice that seemed to emanate from the others as well, _"He is ours and you will not have him. If you again try to lay a hand on him, you will know a pain greater than death. He is ours,"_ the voice now focused from the red cloak as a second set of red eyes opened above the first, _"He __**is**__**MINE**__!"_

The last words were accented with a burst of power bringing Voldemort more pain than he could ever remember feeling before the world as a whole faded to black. And now, awake, even as a memory, those red eyes, though he would never admit it aloud, filled him with fear. He'd have to speak with Severus to find who Potter could know who could make such use of their connection.

A connection, he noted, which now seemed to be severed and gone.

88888888

Harry sat and ate as he got a crash course in what he'd missed by spending nine months out of the year at Hogwarts and the rest of his life with a family who were disgusted by and quick to dismiss anything not 'normal'. He'd heard rumors in his younger years about things like a vigilante in the shadows of a large American city and the story of the man of steel, but at the time he thought they were just tall tales and urban legends, but apparently the super heroes of the world had become much more common over the last few years.

And now he was married to one of them.

Not only married to a super-heroine, but one not of this world, and not entirely of his species.

Harry sat eating slowly as he processed everything. His wife sat next to him. Originally he had sat on a separate chair, but it gave out the moment he rested on the cushion, forcing him to share the loveseat (the irony), whose only damage seemed to be that it let out an occasional sigh, with Raven as she explained the ways of the world and how they'd changed in recent years.

Raven sat in silence as well, mostly out of a sense of fear. She wasn't too surprised that he'd been out of touch with the world, and didn't know about things like Superman, Batman and the Justice League, but she knew she knew her heritage would probably be the biggest bomb to drop. However, she felt it was best to hear from her now, than to have to explain, in the real possibility that Beast Boy made an inappropriate "Father-in Law" joke, once Harry met her team.

"So," Harry finally said after a long silence, "Your…father is a super powerful monster that forced himself on your mum, got locked away, and tried to use you to be free from whatever hell you sealed him back into?" Harry took a moment, "Well, I guess it's kinda…nice, I suppose, not to be the only messed up one in this relationship." He took a moment before asking, "Are you sure you want this? I mean, I don't even remember meeting you, and I don't know what I said to-"

"You were drunk off your ass, Harry, but I was sober," Well, mostly, but he didn't need to know about the half dozen Long Island Iced Teas, "and fully in control of my facilities. You were just some drunken guy winning big and who wanted to try his luck with me, but there was something there." She took his hand in hers and looked into his eyes, "Harry, I've never been a girl to go woozy over romance, I never really believed in soul-mates or love at first sight. All my life I've had to keep a tight rein on my emotions, I've had to keep myself numb because even slight emotions could make something explode or hurt someone else. But since I've been around you, I've felt complete, like I've found a piece I didn't know I was missing," She laughed a bit to herself, "I mean look at me now, I've never been the romantic type of girl I am with you, when I'm with you, I've never felt as free as I have with you, I've never felt **anything** like I have since I met you." She paused for a breath, bringing a hand to cup Harry's face, "I know this is sudden for the both of us, but I was never even sure I'd find somebody who'd be with me, and I want to give this a chance…If you'll have me."

Things were going through Harry's head a mile a minute. This was a very attractive, unique, intelligent young woman he'd apparently gotten to marry him and she was begging to stay with him.

Any thought, though, was interrupted by a bell like sound. Quickly following it to his now very shredded pants, he pulled out the compact mirror Sirius had given him, opened it, and was greeted by the panicked face of Remus Lupin.

"Harry? Harry! Thank goodness! Where are you? Are you okay?"

"Remus, calm down!" Harry called out, "I'm fine, Moony, what's wrong."

"Harry," Remus began shakily, "I think I did something big last night."

_You're not the only one_, Harry thought, looking up to Raven, "Moony, I think I've got you be-"

"Punkin', who ya talkin' to?" A bubbly voice came from Moony's side of the mirror.

Remus looked Harry in the eye, "Harry, I got married."

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_**May answer to a challenge I posted over in Whitetigerwolf's forums. A few others have tried it, check them out. Here's the challenge…**_

**Name:Harry Potter's Vegas Vacation Challenge**

**Category:** Harry Potter & DC Comics and/or Animated Universe (Because I like DC)

A little idea I had.

Sirius fakes his own death (Hey, if a rat like Pettigrew can do it on his own, why can't Sirius when he can enlist pretty much anyone in the order to help?), and has his will enacted, emancipating Harry for one good reason.

To send Harry to Las Vegas (With Moony as a 'responsible' chaperone).

With fake muggle ID in hand (Perhaps a glamor or two), the two take to the town. But in true Hangover fashion, Harry has too much to drink and blacks out, waking up a day or two later...with a wedding ring.

**Requirements:**

-Harry has to go to Las Vegas, Nevada (If you want, you can do a Fem!Harry instead)

-Moony has to travel with him as chaperone (If you do Fem!Harry, you either have to have a Fem!Remus, or choose McGonagall or Tonks as chaperone)

-Harry has to get married to a super, Villain or hero is your choice, but has no memory of the wedding.

-He does NOT get a divorce for whatever reason (Wife talks him out of it, he really falls for her, magically binding, whatever reason you want)

-Magical law is different outside Europe to allow for Magical Supers

-Harry wakes up with no idea where Moony (Or Fem!Harry's chaperone) is, but his wife says (s)he was at the wedding.

-Harry's wife was completely (or at least mostly) sober when they were married

-Harry gets married by an Elvis impersonator

-The Potter Luck strikes, Harry, while drunk, won a LOT of money at the casinos, and is in a comp-ed room when he wakes up.

-The Potter Luck strikes again, Harry and his wife have to fight someone before they even leave Vegas, and win quickly thanks to Harry

**Forbidden:**

-No Slash for Harry(Nothing against Homosexuals, but it seems a lot of HP/DC crossovers are guy on guy)

**Reccomended:**

-Takes Place either in August of fifth year, or during winter break, which I think would be easiest to work it in

-The Statute of Secrecy was signed in before the Revolutionary War (Which is true, according to HP wiki it was signed in 1692), so it at least doesn't apply/isn't enforced in America outside the 13 original colonies or not at all in America.

-Harry's wife should probably be at least aware of magic

-Remus (Or Fem!Harry's chaperone) gets drunkenly married

-Probably easiest to stick with one wife, but if you can make more work, I won't stop you.

**0-0-0-0-0-0-0**

The first girl pops into my head for this is either Raven or Jinx from Teen Titans. Zatanna would probably be easy, but maybe too easy.


	2. Wild Nights

_**Disclaimer: I am a college student, by and large we own nothing. I also make no money with this, evident by the fact that nobody would pay to read this anyway.**_

_**Chapter 2-Wild Nights**_

Harry stood outside the door of what was originally his hotel room when he and Moony had arrived at Vegas. His clothes were repaired, but more threadbare than ever even with the repair spell he tried to use. Thankfully, his new wife's abilities made for a very short trip to the other hotel, and the 'Dark Energy' she used felt oddly comforting.

*Knock-Knock*

Harry heard scrambling inside the room as soon as he'd knocked, and in seconds, it flew open to reveal a slightly haggard looking Remus Lupin.

"Harry, thank goodness you got here so quick. I," He then noticed Raven, "Um, I'm sorry, who is this?"

"Of course," Raven sighed before looking him in the eyes, "It's me, Remus, Rachel," at the blank look, she held up her right hand, "You were at mine and Harry's wedding."

Moony's eyes shot wide, "Y-Y-Your-You mean," he turned to Harry, "Then you too? And-but," He stopped, seeming ready for a stroke of some sort, before sighing, "Sirius is never going to let us live down." He stepped aside, motioning the young couple in, "Well, you may as well come meet my new wife."

Harry entered and quickly moved towards his bedroom to change clothes, returning surprisingly quickly in a new pair of loose pants.

"So," Harry began awkwardly.

"Yeah," Remus added.

After a few moments of silence, Raven finally had enough, "Well, I guess since you don't remember, my name is Rachel Potter, formerly Roth, I'm Harry's wife and everyone calls me by my Azarathian name Raven." Letting Remus stare for a moment, she nodded, "And now you give your introduction."

"Right," Remus nodded, "Um, I'm Remus Lupin, and I was a friend of Harry's dad. I came with him to keep him out of trouble, fat lot of good that did," he grumbled at the end.

Not really knowing what else to say, Harry just went ahead and asked, "So, you got married too?"

Moony sighed, "Yeah, apparently. I just woke up earlier and she was there, and we had matching rings. I found the license while looking for your mir-" he suddenly stopped for a moment, looking to Raven.

"She knows, Moony," Harry assured him, "she's magic too,"

"Really?" Remus asked, surprised, "Well, anyway, I found the license looking for the emergency mirror, and-" He was cut off when a towel clad someone popped in and hugged him from behind.

"Punkin', baby, you wanna join me in the tub?" Finally taking notice that there were other in the room, the blonde woman's expression soured a bit, "Who are you-" she stopped as her eyes fell on Raven, "Hey, ain't you the magic chick on bird-brain's new team?"

"Raven," the sorceress corrected, "And you're Harley Quinzel."

"Nuh-uh, not anymore, now I'm Harley Lupin," She said with pride before pointing angrily at Raven, still hiding behind Moony, "and you can't take me in, I'm got let out and I ain't done anything you can charge me wit'."

All the sudden, a screech and a crash were heard from outside the window. Rushing to the window, the group saw a several block long traffic jam, people running on foot, and basically what seemed to be a lot of people trying to get the hell out of Vegas. Raven turned and looked to Harley, who grinned sheepishly.

"Heh-heh, I can explain…"

8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8

"…I've tucked away a great big time bomb somewhere on the Vegas strip, and only the Justice League can stop it." The Joker said, his words being broadcast across numerous channels, "Because if anyone else tries, then I press this," He continued, showing a big red buttoned remote control, "and KABLOOEY, no waiting."

Standing, the clown walked across the room, the camera following, "Now I know you'll want to see the big bomb hunt from the best possible angle, so I've set up hundred of cameras all across town, the League won't be able to burp without us looking in on them. And since every good suspense show needs to have a ticking clock, here's mine," at his command, a timer appeared at the corner of the screen, reading just below 23 minutes, "oh, what did you expect from me, a round number?" Holding a hand to his earpiece, Joker smiled wide, "And it seems we're getting our first remote in, now since our normal anchor-lady wandered off into the Vegas nightlife and has yet to return," that seemed to come out strained, the Clown prince clearly angry, before continuing, "We've enlisted a local favorite, Sue Manteris. So what's going on there Sue?"

The camera switched to a nervous looking, black haired woman, "W-well, Mister Joker, we're over the south end of the Las Vegas strip, and traffic is bumper to bumper as people are trying their best to leave town, some even seem to be leaving on foot."

"Sorry to interrupt, Sue," The Joker cut in, "but it seems that one of our stars is approaching the red carpet." The feed cut to the bat-wing landing outside Rong Town casino, "And he's in black, always sheik," The Javelin jet landing next to it, "But here come the fashion disasters. I'm surprised their mommies let them out of the house looking like that. Well, while they stumble around trying to find my bomb, let's see how the local economy is doing." The shot cut to a pan of an empty Casino, "Oh, it looks a little slow," The camera panned to a single old lady at a slot machine, "What's this? Madam, aren't you scared?"

"Of what, this thing will pay off sooner or later," The old lady growled as she kept playing.

Joker laughed loudly, "I love this town," He laughed for a few moments before "And now back to the boy in blue," the screen cut to Superman, hovering in mid-air, "Clueless as usual, wait a minute, what's this?" Superman took off, "Sue, are your seeing this?"

"Y-yes," the nervous news anchor nodded in the chopper, "It seems Superman is heading back to the Rong Town casino," she finished with a little hope in her voice.

Silent for a moment, Joker slapped a palm to his forehead, "Of course, he's got X-ray vision, he can see it! Oh, silly me."

The camera cut to the inside of the casino as the man of steel flipped over a roulette table, revealing a bomb in the floor, the Flash coming up behind him.

"Big un'," The speedster commented.

"You were expecting anything less from the joker?"

The screen cut back to the clown prince of crime, "Oh, woe is me, or woe would be me, except this is Vegas, and I always have a card or two up my sleeve."

Cutting back the bomb, "It looks like a binary set-up, but I can't tell what chemicals are-AHH!" Superman began, before being blasted from behind by one of four people entering.

"Ladies and gentlemen," The jokers voice was heard, "tonight's extra special guest stars, making their world debut, the Royal Flush Gang! Jack! Ten! King! And Queen!"

King fired another energy blast, which Flash avoided. Ten made a running tackle at Superman, but Jack, who moved to follow, was nailed by a red energy blast to the back, dropping him like a lead weight and showing the Green robed teen standing behind him, his face hidden in the darkness of his hood.

Superman managed to throw Ten off, but the gang member quickly got back up. The Flash was playing with King, but almost took a hit from behind until a black barrier appeared, stopping Queens Magnetic attack before forming into a blue robed figure, her face hidden like her counterpart.

"WHAT?" Joker yelled, as the powers ripped stone tiles from the floor, effectively negating Queen's magnetic onslaught before knocking her out.

"What are you doing?" a voice behind the blue robed Raven growled, turning her face-to-face with the goddamn Batman, "Do you realize what you've done?"

"We've saved your ass," The green robed teen said, dropping the unconscious Jack as Flash did so with King.

"No fair, No fair!" Jokers voice came from the casino intercom, "You broke the rules, and now you have to pay the price." There was a click then a tense silence, then another click, and another, and another.

"What's going on here?" The joker bellowed.

"That would be me," A disembodied voice commented, before shimmering into existence as a man in jeans and a hoody, his face hidden behind a few spells and the hoods shadow, "A little transfiguration, a couple of short illusions and all your real bombs are kaput without you knowing."

"WHAT?" Joker yelled, "But-But how did you find my bombs? How did you even know there were more?"

"'Cause of me," Another voice added, before a veil dropped to reveal Harley Quinn, in full make up, "Mistah J, I QUIT!" She shrieked at the camera, before wrapping an arm around the man in the hoody, "I found a real man who loves me, and treats me right, and," she finished up by pulling off a glove and showing a ring, "He isn't afraid of commitment." Another thought popped into her head, "And he's way better in the sack," she added, nuzzling into his arm, "A real wild animal."

Joker growled, "Doesn't matter, because you know what? This show has been on all the news channels, and the last few minutes or so have been picked up by a couple of broadcast networks, and while not as much as I would have hoped for the project, by my projections we've got somewhere between 30 to 40 million viewers watching, which is just what I wanted," Joker said as he spun a chair around to reveal a dark haired teen, staring unblinkingly at the camera, "Because, thanks to this little Ace up my sleeve, you'll all be witness to my greatest joke ever, because everyone watching will soon be completely, and utterly insane."

"But you can't stop watching, can you? I'd like to say it's because of my animal magnetism, but really it's all thanks to my little Ace in the hole." Showing Ace in her seat, never blinking, "Different they called her, some even said she was a monster, and really, could this be a monster? I ask you," Joker asked as a baby picture of Ace was shown beneath her eyes, before panning to a couple looking in horror into space, "eh, purely rhetorical, of course. Condemned for something she could barely comprehend, our little Ace soon became a guest of the government, but even they were afraid of her strange power, but they had this little headband that made her as harmless as a drowned kitten."

Stepping close, he wrapped a hand around her shoulder, "Oh my little Ace-y, all your life people recoiled in fear of you, and boy can I relate, and maybe that's why I was never afraid of you. You see has the power to alter perception, for the normal Joes out there, that means she can make you crazy just by looking at you, in person or on TV. Even as I speak, all you couch potatoes are losing your grip on reality, which I think is overrated anyway, but you can bring yourself to look away or even change the channel, even though you know something is very wrong. And the best part is, I'm immune, because I'm already crazy. So turn it up, Ace." Joker said with a laugh, before he barely managed to dodge a red light that flew past as he found the two meddling robed kids staring down at him.

"Sorry," Raven quipped, "but your show's been cancelled."

Joker growled, before smiling, "But we've just got to the best part, show 'em Ace!"

The girl in question turned sharply to the pair. Raven looked away, but she caught Harry's eyes and he felt something odd. If Voldemort's intrusions could be described as the pain of a battering ram working its way into his head, this was more like a cold breeze slipping its way in, before everything went blank.

8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8

Both Harry and Ace found themselves standing upon rocks floating in nothingness.

"What have you done?" Ace asked softly.

"Me?" Harry questioned, "I thought you did this."

"No, it had to have been you," Ace said, a bit of edge in her voice as she locked eyes with Harry again, "What have you done?" She asked, angry, as she used her powers again, but again they didn't act as they should have, instead of madness flowing into his mind, thoughts and memories flowed into hers. She saw herself alone and unloved, locked beneath the stairs, she saw the other children ridiculing her, dogs trying to bite at her, chasing her for hours, hope and knowledge of parent that weren't hers, friends that weren't hers in a school that, though she'd never truly been there, made her so happy. She saw people loft her up on their shoulders in happiness, she saw people fear and distrust her for a power she didn't understand and for things that were not her fault, she saw beasts and monsters trying to kill her, a dragon chasing her, a small, fat man judging her, a friend falling dead, the ghosts of parents that were not hers.

She saw a green light.

She saw herself with a beautiful young woman after a few too many drinks, she saw the young woman shoot down her repeated advances, but she was swayed, the fun they had, the love that grew in her violet eyes.

She saw four great red eyes glaring at her, before showing her a hidden truth.

Harry himself saw the jumbled memories ace saw, his life in a blender, but he could more than see what she was seeing, he could feel her reactions, the longing when she saw his friends, the fear when she saw the beasts, the basilisk, the dragon, Fluffy, her sorrow and an odd, slight sense of kinship at his sad, lonely childhood, and the fear, distrust and outright hatred he was treated with over the years.

He saw what must have been the lost memories of the past few days, he saw himself act like a complete fool, but somehow win over the girl who would soon be his wife, and he saw the devotion in her eyes as they danced together under the lights.

He saw the red eyes, and they whispered to him in a soft, smoky voice.

_Try to be more careful, beloved…_

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Joker cackled as the green robed punk got caught by Ace, somehow freezing the girl up as well, but his confidence as the girl's eyes flashed bright red, the guys doing the same. Turning to Ace, thinking she'd done something, he found the girl right next to him, quickly reaching into his jacket and pulling out a large metal ring.

Joker quivered as Ace glared at him, "Ace-y, look, I can explain," he said, backing away, as she kept glaring in contempt. Hitting a wall, Joker fell to the ground, shielding his face, "Don't do this."

"Don't do what?"

Joker relaxed, looking up, "That's my little Ace-y, everything is-" he stopped when he saw her eyes glow yellow, screaming as his twisted mind fell into darkness, his body going limp.

Ace walked calmly to the door, before looking back to the couple looking at her.

"Where will you go?" Raven asked calmly.

Thinking for a moment, Ace replied, "Nowhere." Walking calmly as the doors opened for her, she heard Harry, as she now knew him, call after her.

"If you need help, you know where to find us."

Nodding, more to herself than anyone else, Ace kept walking, the door closing behind, leaving the young couple, a few still hallucinating television workers and a catatonic Joker behind.

**8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8**

**A.N. – And that's the second chapter, based largely on the Justice League episode "Wild Cards" with excerpts from it. This took so long to write because, aside from my own lasiness and everyday life, I had to find a copy of the show to watch.**

**I don't mean to make Harry or Raven seem overpowered, but Raven is pretty damn powerful, and Harry is no slouch.**

**I don't have much of the next chapter figured out yet, but it will have a hashing things out with the league, some info on what's happening with Harry's mind, Raven's powers and the severed connection with Voldemort, as well as what basically amounts to Harry meeting his other wives, even though he's only married to Raven.**

**Sorry, I'm kinda making this up as I go from here.**

**And now, in addition, an AU omake, you see when I first posted this challenge on WhiteTigerWolf's forums, there was a lot of talk, some ideas thrown around and a few good, funny things, so here's something else that has absolutely nothing to do with the above story, but is a funny little thing none the less. Enjoy…**

8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8

In a hotel room in Las Vegas, a lump of blankets groaned loudly as he tried to figure out what the hell hit him.

It had started out simply enough, well, simple compared to his life. Sirius faked his own death (He didn't mention how, only that it involved a Knockturn Alley whore, two liters of dragons' blood, a Puffeskin, five meters of dental floss and a cricket bat with a three inch hole in the center, and that it somehow left Lucius Malfoy without his left testicle) and with some legal finagling only done by a strange half-goblin half-veela (Yes, you can take a moment to shudder at that thought), Harry was left emancipated and with all the riches and properties of the black family, save for some gold and the family island in the Caribbean, which was left to an unknown Irishman by the name of Paddy Footman. The only stipulation was that, in order for Harry to get the money, he had to spend a week in Las Vegas, Nevada, and take one Remus John Lupin with him.

Apparently not trusting the werewolf to keep Harry on the straight and narrow, Dumbledore had insisted that Professor McGonagall go with them, but what he forgot was that, while Minerva was a teacher, she was also a Scott. At first she did what she was sent to do, but one hour, several tequilas and a bottle of fine scotch later, she was calling Harry a "Manky Dobber" for not trying something called Everclear. Now Harry didn't know what the hell a Manky Dobber was, but damned if he'd be called that by a shit-faced old woman, and after the burning had passed on the third shot, Harry didn't remember anything.

Cautiously peeking out of his covers, Harry cursed the light of the rising sun. Rolling over, Harry was treated to a unique sight, a girl, and a nude girl at that, a nude, orange skinned, green eyed girl smiling at him.

And was it mentioned that she was hovering in mid-air beside the bed, smiling wide at him?

And was it mentioned that she was naked, because that seems like a very important point to Harry.

"Good morning to you, beloved husband Harry."

It took all of ten seconds for that statement to grind its way through Harry's hangover addled mind, but when it did, everything stopped with the calm grace of a freeway twenty car pileup.

Speaking quietly, if only as not to hurt his own head further, Harry asked, "Did you just say I am your husband?"

Looking confused for a moment, the young woman, did he mention she was nude, because that kept popping up in his head as something to remember, spoke in realization, "Oh, you memory must have been befuddled by the copious amounts of alcohol you had been drinking." Smiling again, she continued, "Yes, I am Koriand'r, princess and next in line to the throne of the planet Tamaran, and your new wife, married by the King of the Rock and the Roll."

Okay, a whole new problem was just tossed in there, Princess of a planet? Either he had a naked crazy lady hovering next to him, or he had a naked alien princess hovering next to him, and he wasn't quite sure which would be the better outcome.

"Beloved husband, I am sorry to interrupt your thoughts, but food has been brought for the morning meal, and my friends have said that it is the most important meal of the day for humans."

Nodding dumbly as his mind worked overtime trying to process, Harry stood, thankful he at least had his boxers on, put on a robe and followed her out into the hotel room's main area, where he found another, younger girl in a black and white leotard, her hair was to her shoulders and somewhat messy, and she had slightly orange skin as well, but to a much lesser degree. She turned from watching cartoons and eating cereal to see him, and uttered something that had a far more profound effect than anything Koriand'r had said.

"Good morning, daddy."

Stopping cold, Harry could swear he heard a sound similar to when Dudley was learning to drive Vernon's car, but didn't know how to shift gear in a manual transmission. After about thirty seconds of silence, Harry turned to Koriand'r, who was still naked, and asked, "Did she just call me daddy?"

"Yes, she is our daughter."

Not sure what to ask next, harry just let it flow, "And why are you naked?"

As if he had said something strange, she cocked her head to the side, "Why would I have needed to hide myself from or feel uncomfortable around my beloved family?"

Not sure how to answer that, Harry went for the more awkward, "Do you just give birth really fast?"

Giggling, Koriand'r answered, "No, in fact, tameranian pregnancy lasts about one month and two week longer than a human pregnancy. Ace is adopted, you used your blood and mine in one of your potions, and when she drank it, she changed and you said she was now as if we had birthed her naturally. She is our daughter by blood."

Blood Adoption, something Harry only knew about because of a particularly vindictive potions assignment. The potion formula was supposed to not only be incredibly difficult to do, but the instructions were supposed to be lost to time, not even the Flamels knew it, and yet somehow, in a drunken stupor, he had recreated it?

As his right eye twitched, Harry's only thought was, _Oh Bloody Hell._

8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8

Groaning as she raised herself from the bed, Minerva cursed not bringing her usual 'traveling potions'. Looking around, she found she was alone in a hotel room, but not her hotel room, meaning she had again hooked up, and the sizzling and smell of bacon said the hook-up in question was still here.

_Please be a man this time, please be a man this time-_

Entering the next room, she was relieved to see it was a man, balding with grey hair, but he was in impressive shape for his age. Turning, still holding the pan, his mustache twitched when he saw her.

"Oh, I had hoped that I could finish breakfast before you woke up, Minnie." He said with a smile, "Just sit on down, my dear, and prepare for my famous omelet, a Pennyworth Special."

Smiling to herself, enjoying the delicious smell in the air, Minnie only thought, _Jackpot!_

8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8

Remus groaned, rising from the rough stone floor of the cave he had apparently slept in, but the cave didn't bother him, no, it was the group of wild coyotes sleeping around him, and one female who seemed to be affectionately nuzzling him in her sleep.

Barely keeping himself from screaming, Remus inched away just enough to apparate without bringing the canines with him. Standing in the middle of the dessert, clad only in his underwear, with a gas station just in sight on the horizon, Remus only thought, _This is why I don't like drinking._

8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*8

**Okay, the ideas discussed in the forum were**

**Drunken, genius super Harry and Ace as a daughter-Me**

**Blood adopt Ace-Deathknightimas**

**And sorry for anyone offended by McGonagall's bit while she was drinking, but I won't be changing it.**


End file.
